Honey, The Kids Are Drunk
by jani11
Summary: I got this idea from the story "A Matter of Time" by icecreamlova. The four mages get their hands on a bottle, and a series of hilarious events unfold. Rated M for underage drinking.


Tris, Briar, Daja, and Sandry sat slouched in their chairs, watching the temple dedicates conversing with each other. Some were getting refreshments while some stood around talking. The walls were set with many torches, and decorations adorned the walls.

"I'm _so_ bored," grumbled Tris. Briar yawned while Sandry and Daja nodded in agreement.

"Same here. No one wants to dance, just look at them! We've been here for an hour and not one interesting thing has happened so far." Sandry threw up her hands in exasperation.

"Some party," remarked Daja. "Maybe we should've stayed at Discipline." Briar shook his head.

"We would be bored there too." Suddenly he sat up straight. Then a slow, sneaky smile crept across his face. Tris knew he was up to no good.

"Briar, what are you thinking?" she asked, narrowing her eyes suspiciously. Sandry hoped it was something fun. He turned to them and smirked, "What do you kids say to a drink?" Daja's eyes bugged. Sandry and Tris's jaws hit the ground.

"But we're not allowed-"

Briar interrupted, "Lark and Rosethorn never said we couldn't. Besides, if I have to stay here for one more minute and watch these bleaters stand around and blab all day, I'll lose my mind!"

Daja shrugged. She couldn't argue with that. Besides, she'd never had a drink before and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to try it. Tris, despite herself, was curious. She'd always wondered what it was like to get drunk. She'd heard that it was fun. Sandry seemed to be mauling it over.

"Well, I don't know…" She cast an uncertain look toward where Lark stood, talking with another dedicate.

"Aw, come on, don't be such a goody-good. Everyone does it. I'll be right back." He got up and casually walked over to the refreshment table. Briar knew by his experience as a thief to act natural so as to not give himself away. Luckily, no one was at that particular table. The table sported two bottles of rum, a platter of cookies, and other goods. Looking around to make sure no one was watching him, Briar quickly took a bottle and shoved it in his coat. Then he swiped a bottle opener. His task complete, he walked back to where the girls were watching with a mixture of disapproval and genuine fascination.

"If we're going to do this, we better get out of here," said Tris, biting her lip and looking around the circular room.

"Yeah," Sandry chipped in. "If we get caught, Rosethorn will hang us all from the well." Daja smiled as Briar beckoned for them to follow him. They left the grand room of the temple and walked out into the halls, where they took the nearest exit. It was already night, and as the children walked away from the temple and all its lights, Sandry instinctively drew closer to her friends. Besides her fear of the dark, she felt rather skittish, like she was involved in a crime, which wasn't that far-fetched. Briar, who had done a lot worse than nick a bottle in his time, felt right at ease. He led them toward some overgrown bushes some ways from the temple so that no one was likely to find them.

"What if someone finds us?" inquired Daja as the four walked behind the bushes and sat cross legged on the grass, resting their backs against the brick wall of the building that stood behind the bushes.

"Nah." Briar dismissed the thought with a flap of his hand. "No one ever comes here at this hour. So long as we keep quiet, no one's going to spot us."

It was a bit crowded behind the bush, and all four of them were pressed up against one another. It was also dark, the only light coming from the sliver of a moon overhead and the scintillating stars. Sandry was a bit frightened of being in the dark away from civilization, but Briar, among the plants, was perfectly at home. He took the bottle out of his coat along with the bottle opener. Popping the cork, he took a swing.

"That's good stuff," he remarked, wiping his mouth on his sleeve in a way that would've earned him a disapproving scowl from Rosethorn had she seen. He passed the bottle to Tris. The weather mage slowly held the bottle up to her lips and took a sip. The other strained their eyes against the dark to see her reaction. Tris knew she shouldn't be doing this, it was wrong, but she didn't want to be teased for chickening out this late in the game. Cringing from the strong flavor of alcohol, she quickly gave the bottle to Sandry, who came up coughing and wincing after taking her turn.

"That burns!" she gasped, massaging her throat. Briar rolled his eyes, even though no one could see it.

"Of course it does, what do you think it is, tomato juice?"

Sandry glared and gave the bottle to Daja. Daja, instead of taking a sip to start with, took a gulp instead. The rum burned like liquid fire, as though she were in a forge, warming her insides once it had settled. Daja found that she rather enjoyed the sensation. After another round, Sandry commented, "I actually kind of like it. It gives me a warm feeling in my belly."

"Me too," nodded Tris. To her, the rum also gave her a warm, peaceful feeling like someone wrapping her arms around her. She found herself lusting for more.

"Me three," said Daja. After round six, everyone was feeling a bit tipsy. Sandry giggled like a schoolgirl while Tris started humming a song about weather. Daja felt her mind drifting like the smoke in Frostpine's forge. Briar lounged back against the hedge. He'd never felt so carefree in his life. The small, rational part of him knew that they'd have to answer to their teachers later for coming home so late, but at the moment he couldn't care less.

"Hey, how about we make this a little more interesting?" He flashed a grin.

"I'm all ears," replied Daja. She felt loose and up for just about anything.

"I bet you couldn't swallow three whole gulps without coughing your lungs out," he challenged. Sandry grabbed the bottle.

"Oh, yeah? I bet I could!" Tipping her head back, she chugged three mouthfuls all in one go. She clamped her hand over her mouth to muffle a scream of both pleasure and pain. She fought down the urge to cough as the burning liquid worked its way down her throat.

"All, right, Sandry!" cheered Daja. Tris and Briar clapped.

"My turn!" squealed Tris, taking the bottle. Like Sandry, she chugged three mouthfuls, but within one second was coughing and hacking.

"Oh, Tris is out!" announced Briar with a guffaw. "You sounded like a dying old lady!"

Sandry and Daja doubled over hooting with laughter, holding their sides.

"Oh, shut up." Tris gave Briar a playful whack on the arm. Daja took the challenge next and barely passed. Briar, just to show off, swallowed four mouthfuls instead of three. The rum seared his throat.

"You look funny!" Sandry giggled childishly, as Tirs and Daja howled with laughter. By now, the childen's eyes had adjusted to the darkness, allowing them to see the silly look on Briar's face.

"Woah, what a rush!" exclaimed Briar. He set the bottle down and rolled over onto his back, staring dazed up at the ceiling of stars.

"Don't you go kicking me now," he said, pushing Sandry's foot out of his side in the tight space. Sandry felt like the sky was spinning.

"We should get going," mumbled Tris, although it came out as, _"Welsh ood it goin'"_

"Ugh, I feel like garbage," remarked Daja, lurching unsteadily to her feet. Her legs felt wobbly. The other three also stood up, feeling the ground roll under them. Sandry stumbled and fell into the bush, causing Briar to erupt into laughter.

"Hey, what are we doing on a ship?" asked Daja, squinting through the dark at the ground. In her alcohol fueled mind, she thought she was still sailing at sea. Tris pulled Sandry out of the bush , with some effort on her part not to fall as well.

"Time to hit the road!" Briar announced, stepping out from their hiding space out into the open.

"Ouch, not so loud!" winced Sandry. Briar's voice echoed painfully through her ears. Briar began to walk towards the road leading back to Discipline. The girls followed them, staggering around like they had forgotten how to walk. It took a while, but finally they stepped onto the dirt trail.

"Where is everybody?" asked Tris. Sure enough, the landscape was deserted, and chillingly quiet. Daja wondered how long they'd been away from the party. It seemed like hours yet like minutes. Time seemed to blend together.

"They're probably at home. Come on, we have to go home. Lark and Rosethorn will be so happy to see us!" Sandry sounded like a little girl waiting for the day after Christmas to open her presents. The four mages ambled down the dark dirt path back to Discipline Cottatge under the night sky, all the while singing a popular children's song terribly off key, and loud enough that some people opened up their windows, glared, and slammed them shut. Soon the troublemakers were on the doorstep of their home. It had taken a while to arrive, considering that Daja, Sandry, Tris, and Briar could barely take two steps without tripping over their own feet. Tris knocked on the door, or rather, she thought she knocked. In reality, she had banged on the door so hard one would think that she was trying to break it down. In an instant, the door flung open, revealing a scowling Rosethorn with her arms crossed over her chest. She had changed out of her party dress into something more comfortable.

"Where on earth have you four been?!" she grabbed Briar, dragging him over the threshold. The boy stumbled inside.

"Honestly, do we have to watch you every minute of every day?" The dedicate flung up her hands in frustration. Lark came into view, her brow furrowed with worry. She rushed over to embrace Sandry, who had just come in, followed by Tris and Daja.

"Are you alright? We thought you had come home before us, but when we arrived you children were nowhere to be found! We were just about to go looking for you."

"We're fine," answered Sandry with a slight slur in her speech, pulling away and looking up at her teacher. She squinted like she was trying to focus at the world through a kaleidoscope. She smiled absent-mindedly at nothing in particular. Briar looked at Rosethorn and thought, _"Woah, your hair is really nice today. Have I told you that before?"_ He didn't think that Rosethorn could hear his thoughts, but little did he know that his mouth was actually speaking the words out loud. Sandry guffawed and fell to her hands and knees on the floor. Tris hobbled over to the table and dropped into a chair. She felt everything shifting in and out of focus. Her head was pounding badly. Daja slumped against the wall and slid down, laying crumpled on the floor.

"Wake me up when it's morning," she muttered before passing out. Rosethorn's mouth fell open. Lark turned as white as a sheet.

"Are you four _drunk_?!" Rosethorn nearly screeched. Briar grinned stupidly.

"What, us drunk? Nah, not a chance!" he flapped a hand in the air. That did it. The next thing he knew, Rosethorn had grabbed him by the shoulders and was shaking him vigorously.

"HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID?" she screamed at him. "WE TURN OUR BACKS FOR ONE MINUTE-"

"Rosie, stop it, you're hurting him!" Lark rushed over to pull the other woman off of Briar. Rosethorn took a deep breath to calm herself, even though she was still trembling slightly with anger. It had been a long time since something had made her loose her temper like that. Lark went over to Sandry, who was sitting on the floor, barely conscious. Tris was in the same state. Lark knelt down beside Sandry, tilting her own head to look into her face.

"Sandry, can you please tell us what happened?" Lark's voice was even but stern. Sandry lifted up an eyebrow and peered at Lark.

"It was Briar's idea to steal the bottle. We went behind the bushes so no one would see," Sandry mumbled.

"The party was too boring," remarked Tris from the table, struggling to keep her eyes open. Lark stood up.

"What do you think should be done, Rosie?" she asked, looking over at Rosethorn.

"Truth be told, I think we should hang them all in the well," the other woman answered, crossing her arms and glaring at all of the children. Lark gave her a disapproving look. Rosethorn sighed.

"Fine. But we have to sober them up a little first before we can tell them what their punishment is, otherwise they won't be able to understand. I'll go make some coffee." Rosethorn went to get the stove ready while Lark fetched the water.

* * *

An hour later, Sandry, Tris, Daja, and Briar sat around the table. They were feeling more alert now with the strong coffee that they'd been made drink. The silly, laughing youngsters from a while ago were gone, leaving four very shameful and humble children in their place. All of them had their eyes cast downward as their teachers handed down their sentence. Briar didn't dare look at Rosethorn for the entire lecture for fear that she might slap him. Though he wasn't in his right mind at the time, he remembered the way Rosethorn had flown at him when she'd found out that he was drunk. Had been sober, he would have been terrified out of his wits.

"Starting tomorrow, you four will be up at the crack of dawn," said Lark. "You'll clean the whole house by yourselves and wash all the dirty laundry."

"After you're done with that, you'll go weed the garden and water the flowers," Rosethorn chipped in with a smirk in Briar's direction. She knew that the boy disliked weeding, and there were plenty of weeds out in the garden this time of year for all of them.

"If you pull out even one of my flowers, I will hang you from the roof by your thumbs and leave you there for a whole month," Rosethorn added for effect.

"And no leaving Discipline for a week," Lark added, looking pointedly at the children. Daja's eyes widened. She looked up at Lark.

"But what about my lessons with Frostpine?" she asked. Lark smiled sardonically.

"I will inform him that you will be unavailable for this week," she answered. Briar groaned and slapped his forhead.

"This is going to be a long week." He leaned against the back of his chair and closed his eyes. Sandry and Tris shared grim looks. Rosethorn grinned.

"Then I suggest you go off to bed so you can get started tomorrow."

All four children got up and glumly shuffled off to their rooms.

"Sweet dreams!" Rosethorn called out mockingly, hearing the doors slam shut.

* * *

The next day, Briar grumpily swept the broom back and forth across the floor. Tris silently dusted the shelves and tables while Sandry scrubbed the dishes. Daja did the drying.

"Man, this sure is fun," grumbled Briar sarcastically as he swept under the table, cursing when he banged his head.

"We already had our fun," answered Tris bitterly.

"One thing's for sure," remarked Sandry, wiping her sweaty forhead with the sleeve of her dress. Daja, Briar, and Tris looked at her.

"What?" they asked. Sandry smiled.

"We sure won't be doing any more drinking," the noble answered.

"You can say that again," snorted Daja. All four of them chuckled haf-heartedly and returned to work.


End file.
